Saturday, February 28, 2009

Ebook Humor: Why the Ex-Perts Call Them E-books

Edward Lear, poet-king of nonsense

Email is now officially spelled with or without the hyphen: why not ebooks?

The ebook world has plenty of technology; we can use a bit of humor and a dash of art. Here is a poetic parody that gripes about the ludricrous hyphen in the word "e-book". Written by a man who is unafraid to put his name at the bottom of a beautiful heap of nonsense.


Why the Ex-Perts Call Them E-Books



“You say e-books, and I say ebooks! Let's call the hyphen off.”
— George and Ira Gershwin

A travesty against our race!
Of every creed and sex —
The adding of the hyphen
By the pompous scholar ex-
Perts, for no other reason
Than to obfuscate the poor
And humble e-book
Which requires nothing more.

“But why not?” ask the ex-
Perts as they while away the hours
Sipping fresh-frapped Capp-
Uccinos in the slippery ivory towers.
“All these lexographic capers
Add a dash of cold romance,
Makes for more grad-student papers,
And more fedly-funded grants.”

See the superfluous hyphen
As it separates the “e” —
From the book’s beloved wife an’
Paper-viewing family.
As we who love this brave new place,
Cannot but stop and think:
O, what a waste of precious space!
O what a waste of ink!

Somewhere in the thankless cold,
A poet longs to e-
At night when all his tales are told
To deaf posterity.
With every lovely line I write —
From heart, and hope, and mind,
The “e” stands all alone at right —
The book is left behind.

—- Michael Pastore

Copyright (c) 2009. From the paperback book and ebook:

50 Benefits of Ebooks:
A Thinking Person's Introduction to the Digital Reading Revolution
Where Ebooks are Low-Cost or Free.


Forthcoming, on March 8, 2009.